Today I am healing. Mentally, that is. Today I will start to slowly gather the pieces of my heart and put them back together. It's been shattered, you see. I spent two amazing weeks with a girl, 89, and I fell in love. And then, for reasons unknown to me, she dissappeared from my life. And I missed her terribly. I spent a few days trying to bring her back, to no avail. Then I spent a couple weeks patiently waiting, hoping she would com around. But I got nothing. Finally I emailed her and asked for her address, because I had bought her a very special, very expensive birthday present. And she didnt reply. So last night I wrote up an email telling her that I was hurt and felt disrespected. I can accept things that I understand. But I dont understand why she left, so I have a very hard time accepting it. Did I scare her off when I told her how I felt? Did she just grow tired of me? Did she find someone new? And if thats the case, why couldnt we still be friends? I am notorious for falling fast and hard for people, but this was a whole new experience. Ive never felt or acted like this toward anyone before. The lengths I would go to for her are undefined. But somewhere, something didnt add up for her. I told her in this email that I wouldnt contact her again, but I would always be around if she ever wanted to be in my life again in any form. I told her that I loved her. And attached song lyrics. Then I said goodbye and hit the send button. I deleted her contact info and pictures from my email and phone. And I cried. And cried. And cried. Ive been crying since she stopped talking to me, its nothing new. But this was a new kind of tears. I woke up this morning still crying. But I was breathing easier. Breathing easier through my tears. So now I must let myself mend. I will never completely give up. I will always hold that small fire of hope that she will come back to me. But I must let myself move on.
How I wish you could see the potential,
the potential of you and me.
It's like a book elegantly bound but,
in a language that you can't read.
Just yet.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
There are days when outside your window
I see my reflection as I slowly pass,
and I long for this mirrored perspective
when we'll be lovers, lovers at last.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
You reject my... advances... and desperate pleas...
I won't let you... let me down... so easily.
So easily.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
I will possess your heart.
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