Living at home is NOT working out for me. Its sad and frustrating. My dad and I have had issues in the past but generally we get along super easily. He's always let me do my own thing and never really questioned it. Now that his girlfriend is living here I am under constant scrutiny. I have to tell him where im going and how long ill be there if I leave the house. I get lectured if I go out on a school night. I am held responsible for any clutter in the house whether it is mine or not. I am also held responsible for any issue in the house whether I caused it or not (overflowing sink, crashed computer, door not locked, etc.) I constantly feel like I am in the way. Evidently my dad cannot handle having two women in his life. He wants to focus ALL of his energy on her, which is sweet, but I get severely way-layed in the process. He also seems to think that he must now enforce all these rules that I have NEVER had before. Setting a curfew (not actually, just endless complaining and demeaning comments if im out late) for the first time when your child is 23 just doesnt work. He is also getting frustrated with giving me rides which is hard when we live out of town. I rode my bike to and from practice today. It took me 2 hours to get into town because of the wind and when I got there I was too exhausted to skate.
Another issue I ran into today is that its looking pretty likely that I will need to re-take my math class. Which means if I take classes in the fall I will continue to be a non-matriculated student. This hasnt caused any issue for me yet but with it being fall quarter it will probably be quite hard to get into any necessary classes so late. I will also have to continue taking out more secondary loans. Another thing my dad has been doing recently is complaining on a daily basis about the amount of my ONE current student loan (he is the co-signer.) I want to avoid this situation as well. And the best option for me financially may be to just wait on school until I am 24 and can file my FAFSA with my own tax information rather than my fathers; as well as move to Oregon and attend the school I really want to go to.
Anyways. All of this adds up to- me needing to move, at the very least. I have quite a few options to consider.
1.) Move into town (in Ellensburg), continue going to school at CWU and taking out student loans until I can file FAFSA and move to Oregon.
Pro- Continuing with school. Can stay with derby.
Con- Taking out more loans, especially to cover housing costs.
Pro- Continuing with school. Can stay with derby.
Con- Taking out more loans, especially to cover housing costs.
2.) Move into town (in Ellensburg), take a break from school, get a job and work for a year until I can file FAFSA and move to Oregon.
Pro- Can stay with derby.
Con- Really hard to find a job right now. Still stuck in Ellensburg.
3.) Move to Seattle and get a job and work for a year until I can file FAFSA and move to Oregon.
Pro- Love Seattle. More social opportunities. Lots of derby. Public transportation.
Cons- Hate rain. Have to give up RCR derby. Hard to find a job right now. Seattle is expensive.
Con- Really hard to find a job right now. Still stuck in Ellensburg.
3.) Move to Seattle and get a job and work for a year until I can file FAFSA and move to Oregon.
Pro- Love Seattle. More social opportunities. Lots of derby. Public transportation.
Cons- Hate rain. Have to give up RCR derby. Hard to find a job right now. Seattle is expensive.
4.) Move to Ritzville with my mom for a year until I can file FAFSA and move to Oregon. Possibly work.
Pros- Living with Mary would be pretty carefree. Might give me a chance to collect my thoughts a bit. I probably wouldnt HAVE to work.
Cons- NO social interaction, its in the middle of nowhere. Have to give up ALL derby, i'd be skating alone at night on the sidewalks and thats it.
Cons- NO social interaction, its in the middle of nowhere. Have to give up ALL derby, i'd be skating alone at night on the sidewalks and thats it.
5.) Move to Oregon NOW and work for a year until I can file FAFSA and get into school.
Pros- I could gain residencey by being in the state for a year and pay cheaper tuition once I get into school. I love Oregon. There is derby in Salem. Public transportation.
Cons- I know virtually no one in Oregon. Its expensive. It rains a lot (so far I dont mind, but who knows if I MOVE there.) Its hard to find a job right now.
So these are the choices im looking at right now. Im thinking that I will probably stay with Mary for a month after school lets out and see how that goes. Just taking a break will be nice. When it comes right down to it im not going to get anywhere in the situation im in right now. Im miserable with my social life and family life and thats no good. If im not happy in those situations im bound to fail in school and other areas. The main thing keeping me in Ellensburg is derby, honestly. I dont have many friends here at the moment. I think i'll be spending a lot of time in the near future researching my options.
Ok, I am generally not a big fan of giving unsolicited advice, but I feel compelled to make order of chaos. Or, attempt to.
ReplyDeleteYou have established a certain set of priorities. They seem to be as such (in no particular order):
Social Life
Derby
Work
School in Oregon
Transportation
Your eventual outcome will be to leave Ellensburg, so it makes sense to leave sooner than later. Because if you take a break from school and get a job, you WILL have better chances in a bigger city. I disagree with the part where you said it would be hard to find a job right now, because, by comparison to the other options listed, it is your best option. Salem's job outlook is (albeit, only slightly) worse than Seattle. The bonus is that you DO have people in Seattle you can rely on, even if it's only just to talk to.
Seattle is the best choice for Social, Derby, Transportation and work. The only thing Seattle can't give you is residency in Oregon. But it can give you a next step.
Of course, you know I'm biased. I miss my Marcy. But I love you and I want to know that you are happy. And, you can't deny that that's some sound logic, even if I am biased.
No matter what you do, I heart you.
#5 hands down. If your going to start over, you might as well do it where you really wanna be.
ReplyDeleteI can't offer too much help with everything but I can offer some info on Seattle, since I've lived here for 5 years.
ReplyDelete-Rain: It honestly doesn't rain as much as you think. Yes, during September-November and March-May, we do get more rain but it's never full on heavy downpours. Seattle rain is pretty mild for the most part and it's rare for it to rain constantly for a day. What we normally get is one and off lightish drizzle.
-Living costs: While it is kinda expensive to live here compared to Ellensburg or other places, but there are still places to find affordable housing. Places like West Seattle and Edmonds offer better prices and with our metro system, you can get anywhere by bus. Even places like Bremerton or Port Orchard have affordable apartments and are just an hour ferry ride from Seattle.
-School: You can always elect to attend Seattle Central for a bit before transferring to a different school. Seattle Central does offer an ASL program and is nicely located in Capital Hill, just East of Downtown. There are also other community colleges in Edmonds, Everett, South Seattle, Shoreline so you would probably be with in a hour of any school depending on where you chose to live.
-Jobs: While it's not the best, if you aren't picky about what you are doing, there is work. Around October/November is when almost every place takes on seasonal employees, and they keep those people on at least through February, if not longer. Also, the school could help you with finding part time work, either at the school or via a job fair. And, if anything, you can just apply for EBT, so even if you are working but not making enough for rent + food, EBT could help. I have friends that do that, since they only make enough for rent and bills.
Seattle might not be the best of options but it does have more opportunity than a smaller city like Ellensburg.
I am DEFINATLEY socliciting advice! This is a decision I will not be able to make alone.
ReplyDeleteSchool is really my #1 priority, but until I can pay for it (a year from now), it might have to get bumped. And without a social life I fail misreably in school anyways.
The reason I was staying in Eburg in the first place was to get some schooling done while living cheap with my father. Both of those things are not really working out. I did get the good news today of being able to skip a couple quarters of ASL and test into a higher class, but im still stuck re-taking my math class.
I say it would be hard to find a job because I see so many of my friends search desperatley with no results. That scares me. Ive been there before (and running into a door will only save you so many times!) And housing is EXPENSIVE. Im not sure how i'd pull working and paying rent off in the city.
Having people in Seattle is definatley a plus for me. I thrive on social interaction. And yes, being able to skate and get around the city is a big plus.
I REALLY hate Seattle rain. Like, cut a vacation short and leave because I despise it.
I wouldnt be able to go to SCC, even though I really want to, because they dont take loans. I dont think going to school will be an option for me right now if I leave Ellensburg. The cost is already getting to me and im only one quarter in.
Yes, I do think that just going to Oregon would be great. But thats a slightly crazy step im just not sure if im ready to make. Thats why im thinking and writing and trying to get input!